Cursed Night

The days are blending together
Pretending like I don’t notice
Drowning in mental fog so thick my hands might close where my throat is
I’m not gonna rap that “I’m cursed”
My words got heavy
And sure enough the steady ebb-and-flow of life subsided, but I wasn’t ready
Last night, I thought up a song
But I’m too wired to hum it

Inspired sight, like tunnel-vision on the life I got from it
Not tired yet, right?
Hah.
It’s fun, I’ll tell ya that much.
Adventures oughta be remembered as such.

But, I’m not well.
Not today, not tomorrow
These souls inside my pocket are just sanity I borrow
“Sayonara” to the sorrow of eternity alone?
Ya, right. *No way.
Part of the joke is that it’s all that I’ve known
It’s justified, I can’t help that I romanticize your concern
Now I can fantasize forever if you never say the words “Goodbye”
This tainted mind-set really must go free
Finding someone so fuckin’ wonderful when I’m just so...
Me

Searching by city light,
You’ll never find me
Running through a cursed night,
“Do you have a death wish?”
Shut the lid tight, it’s complicated
Could ya not look inside, it’s complicated.
Somehow, I’m just a page in, but I’ve cried and I’ve grown
To shut away the conversations of my Highs and Lows
自分の目で見えたいの?
この絶望の美しさ

Laid back in the cracks of my past, it’s kinda funny
Got sick of tricking myself into thinking that others would only run from me
Because, as you know I’m Death,
You heard about me?
I’m kinda famous, now it’s awkward...
But welcome to my constant state of mind
Like, could you knock first?

話せない言葉
みんなの心配ごとは
耳につながらない
Why’s it every time that your kindness is making my chest unbearably tight?
But, not for the first time
It’s a terrible night for a curse,
but don’t you worry, cuz it hurts fine

Drunk, lost, CalliP
Wandering Rengoku-shi
Enlighten me- is this what they call a “sunk cost fallacy?”
Frightening, in spite of things I want tossed my way
I’m looking everywhere at once and months are passing like days

“By myself” is just better.
I know I say that a lot
But if somebody holds you back, then you cannot become god.
Lost in the night, 情けない
Hostile, hostage or free
These childish eyes will only show my mind what I wanna see

Searching by city light,
You’ll never find me
Running through a cursed night,
“Do you have a death wish?”
Shut the lid tight, it’s complicated
Could ya not look inside, it’s complicated.
Somehow, I’m just a page in, but I’ve cried and I’ve grown
To shut away the conversations of my Highs and Lows
自分の目で見えたいの?
この絶望の美しさ

自分の目で見えたいの？
この絶望。。。

自分の目で見えたいの？
Wanna see it?
Fine.
This time, look for yourself.