When I'm in the Mood for Love (You're in the Mood for Herring)

When I'm in the mood for love,
You're in the mood for herring.
When I'm in the mood for herring,
You're in the mood for love.

Love is a fragile thing,
Delicate and elusive.
Herring is not conducive
When I'm in the mood for love.

Why stop to think of herring?
Let's let our passion flower.
Then, darling, if you're still caring,
You can have herring, in half an hour.

(That's the bitter laughter of married people that you're hearing now.)

Herring can always wait.
Herring does not mind waiting.
Meanwhile, I'm marinating!
I'm in the mood for love!