I Can Do Better Than That

My best friend had a little situation
At the end of our senior year
And like a shot, she and Mitchell got married that summer
Carolann getting bigger every minute
Thinking, "What am I doing here?"
While Mitchell's out every night
Being a heavy-metal drummer
They got a little cute house on a little cute street
With a crucifix on the door
Mitchell got a job at the record store in the mall
Just the typical facts of a typical life in a town on the Eastern Shore
I thought about what I wanted
It wasn't like that at all
Made Carolann a cute baby sweater
Thinking "I can do better than that"

In a year or so, I moved to the city
Thinking "What have I got to lose?"
Got a room, got a cat, and got twenty pounds thinner
Met a guy in a class I was taking who you might say
Looked like Tom Cruise
He wouldn't leave me alone 'less I went with him to dinner

And I guess he was cute
And I guess he was sweet
ANd I guess he was good in bed
I gave up my life for a better part of a year
And so I'm starting to think that this maybe might work
And the second it entered my head
He needed to take some time off
Focus on his "career"
He blew me off with a heartfelt letter
I thought "I can do better than that"

You don't have to get a haircut
You don't have to change your shoes
You don't have to like Duran Duran
Just love me

You don't have to put the seat down
You don't have to watch the news

You don't have to learn to tango
You don't have to eat prosciutto
You don't have to change a thing
Just stay with me

I want you and you and nothing but you
Miles and piles of you
Finally I'll have something worthwhile
To think about each morning

You and you and nothing but you
No substitution will do
Nothing but fresh, undiluted and pure
Top of the line and totally mine!

I don't need any lifetime commitments
I don't need to get hitched tonight
I don't want to throw up your walls and defenses
I don't mean to put on any pressure
But I know what a thing is right
And I spend every day reconfiguring my sense
When we get to my house, take a look at that town
Take a look at how far I've gone

I will never go back
Never look back anymore
And it feels like my life led right to your side
And will keep me there from now on
Think about what you wanted
Think about what could be
Think about how I love you
Say you'll move in with me
Think of what's great about me and you
Think of the bullsh*t we've both been through
Think of what's past because we can do better!
We can do better!
We can do better than that!
We can do better than that!