Sheriff Fatman

Sherrif Fatman started out is business as a granny farmer
He was infamous for fifteen minutes
And he appeared on Panorama
Then he somehow got on board a Starship Enterprise Allowance Scheme
With a Prince of Wales Award
For pushing Valium and amphetamines

Moving Up on Second Base
With Nicholas Van what's His Face
At six foot six
And 100 Tons
The undisputed King of the Slums
With more alias' than Klaus Barbie
Master Butcher of Leigh on Sea
Just about to take the stage
The one and only - hold the front page

Fatman's got something to sell
To the Capital's homeless
A Crossroad's Motel
For the No Fixed Abodeless
Where you can live life in style
If you sleep in a closet
And if you flash him a smile
He'll take your teeth as deposit

There's bats in the belfrey
The windows are jammed
The toilet's ain't healthy
He don't give a damn
Just chuckles and smiles
Laughs like a madman
A born again Rachman
Here comes Sherrif Fatman

With his Valium, amphetamines
Sicknotes and his phoney prescriptions
Just when you thought it was safe to go back to the kitchen
Dead heads and cracked heads
Bunk beds and breakfasts
Wake up you sleepyheads
Check this

Moving up on second base
With Nicholas Van Whatshis face
At six foot six
And 100 tons
The undisputed King of the Slums
With more alias' than Klaus Barbie
The Master Butcher of Leigh on Sea
Just about to take the stage
The only and only hold the front page