Henrietta Longbottom

Have you heard them stories
Bout Henrietta Longbottom?
Yeah, I heard a lot of
'em and everybody got 'em
I never really met her but
I know it's all true
I never seen her either but
My brother say she cool
Rumors get around through the
Hood with the quickness
Everyone's a customer
All up in your business
One's in your circle that don't even know ya
The same one's that circulate
The stories for ya

I seen Henrietta sittin' down by the rail
Messin' with a camel toe, talkin' on her cell
Breakin' up some weed
Gettin' ready for her blunt
But she never felt the need to
Fix the wedgie in the front

She kept to herself
Only had a few associates
People of the village got curious
But most would just make up stories
Some rumors some gossip
But Henrietta didn't care
Hands in her pockets

I heard she used to kick it
Down by the river bed
She used to date an old man
That lived out in a shed
I heard he had blue hair
Honestly, who cares?
The whole town used to say
"I wonder what they do there?"

Well, I heard he was bird
Plus he was her dad father of a dragon ball
Her momma was a crocodile
They used to drag race down at the strip
In a Chevy Nova cross bow with an extra clip

Hands up when they rollin' through your city
Chewin' on some stuff
Mix it up with some Wrigley
Fumes from the car makin' everybody dizzy
Bumpin' Flaming Lips, Johnny Cash and Biggie

Kick in the door beatin' her dead horse
It died she made dog food
No loss she's a hooligan
Amateur sex movies and fresh kicks
But her breath smells like Chicken boullian

Have you heard them stories
Bout Henrietta Longbottom?
Yeah, I heard a lot of
'em and everybody got 'em
I never really met her but
I know it's all true
I never seen her either but
My brother say she cool
Rumors get around through the
Hood with the quickness
Everyone's a customer
All up in your business
One's in your circle that don't even know ya
The same one's that circulate
The stories for ya

She had a pink bandanna hangin'
Out her back pocket she was in a gang that
Wore miss matched socks and
Met up every Tuesday for beer and some bingo
Since the horse died she had
To ride a flamingo

Ha, he couldn't talk but he
Knew how to sing she
Did a little dust then cut off his wings then
Stuck them to her back
Took a sniff of gasoline
And went door to door
Tryin' to sell magazines

Hair in a ponytail cocked to the side
Patch on her left, open up the right eye
Dental floss and band aids to
Hold her pants up
20 inch waist but a double D cup

W T Fuck whoo she's a true fox
She uses glue to hold up her tube socks
She's a ninja high score on Centipede
Played pro hockey till her
Body caught an injury

Henrietta Henrietta, girl where you been?
Drowning in a bath tub filled up with gin
Doesn't work a lot but grows her own crop
Last week she killed some Navy Seals
For tryin' to steal her crop

I don't know if you care or you invest
But Henrietta's dead no more no less
Never really met her so I'm not losin' sleep
But Longbottom is long gone rest in peace

Have you heard them stories
Bout Henrietta Longbottom?
Yeah, I heard a lot of
'em and everybody got 'em
I never really met her but
I know it's all true
I never seen her either but
My brother say she cool
Rumors get around through the
Hood with the quickness
Everyone's a customer
All up in your business
One's in your circle that don't even know ya
The same one's that circulate
The stories for ya