Mr. Richland's Favorite Song

When he was young, he sang in the band and his fans all looked the same
And the fans he had were younger than he and they loved to scream his name
They'd leave at the end of the third show, go home to talk of the fun
Well, isn't nice the parents would say, well isn't nice you've got someone
Someone to idolize, he must look twice his size
I think it's great you're going through a phase
And I'm awfully glad it will all be over in a couple of days

Well, the calendar changed and the pages fell off, but the singer remained the same
And he never grew tired of singing his song, and his fans still called his name
They'd leave at the end of the second show, go home to talk of the fun
For most of the fans were married by then, so they had to be in by one

I'm awfully glad, the husbands would say, I'm awfully glad you got someone
Someone, I realize, who used to look twice his size
I think it's great you still remember his name
And I'll bet if he knew you were there for the show
He'd be awfully glad you came

"The time has come," the Walrus said, "to speak of other things"
Like a fallen star who works in a bar where yesterday is king
The fans will stay for an hour or so, they still remember his fame
But the time has come the Walrus said, "to call your fans by name"