17

I was 17 years old but the weight on my shoulders still bears down on me to the day
From all of the parties with all of my friends but still no one there could keep me safe
The cigarettes and alcohol and cocaine days are all just a blur in my head
But suddenly it all seems so clear to me just what happened inside of that bed

So give me another drink and tell me it's all the same but something has never felt right
And as my body gives up and I stumble, you carry me out of the night

And into the darkness
I've carried this torch so far
I told them don't worry
And I'll be alright
But maybe I'm not
Maybe I can't sleep at night
Maybe I can't breathe
But at least you're still ok

I wonder if you ever thought just how bad it got when all that I did was stay quiet
The devil inside my head is at war with Jesus and I'm not sure who'll win this time
I tried all that I could do to keep close and stay away from you but it's hard when your friends are all there
So, what the fuck happened and why does it bother me that I want my friends to care

While I'm in the darkness
They throw their torch in the pond
I told them don't worry
And maybe I'll be alright
I won't say a word
But maybe I can't sleep at night
Maybe I can't breathe
But at least you're ok