Desperate-Rado

Back in the mother fuckin saddle
My six shooter strapped and I'm lookin for a battle
Out on the plains I'm just a loner
My saddle horn rubs right and yo it's givin me a boner

I got thoughts of Annie Oakley
But that buck toothed tramp in that last town she broke me
And we didn't even fuck
I gave my last gold tooth 'n gold nugget to get my dick sucked

3 days out on the frontier
And I'd kill for a cheap whore and a barrel of cold beer
I need a slut for a service
I take a peak at the shiip and they all run away nervous

Man I gotta get my rocks off
'cause my Wranglers don't fit right unless my cock's soft
Long nights by the fire me a Trigger.....go figure

[Chorus]
I'm a desperate rado
Didn't take any practice
A desperate rado

Got a cock like a cactus
Now I drift through the desert like a wild coyote
Horny as a toad trippin off peyote
Holdin uptrains and gettin goods by the sack

I'm known through out the west as the pie eyed mack
And to the law I'm no stranger
I'm wanted dead or alive 'cause I shot the Lone Ranger
And then Tonto tried to get down

So I boned his bitch slit he's throat and then I skipped town
That's the way I run my show
Paint towns red
Fuck hoes and then I lay low

I know you think I'm archaic
But my dick's like a sword
I see pussy and want to slay it
Out on the plains it gets linely

Sometimes I feel homely
New faces
New towns no one knows me
Guns cocked in my holster

You see my face in each town nailed to a pole on a poster
I'm always lookin for the quick buck
Then always blowin my cash on a bitch with a big butt
Some say my head's hollow

Fuck em... I'm just a

[Chorus 2]
Desperate rado
Trottin through the bad lands
A desperate rado
Tokin down with all the cowhands
A desperate rado
Didn't take much practice
A desperate rado

Got a cock like a cactus
Now I fuck whores by the scores up ten fold on any fellow
In any town I can be found at the local bordello
Never yellow never chicken listen for my spurs draggin,

And when I'm kickin dust you better circle up the wagons
So when I rip through your town don't be gawkin
Just tip your hat and Tex keep walkin
'Cause I'm a gun slingin top hand

Fuck with me and you'll go out like Custer at his last stand
I'm a low down buckaroo
If you leave me alone with your mother then I'll fuck her too
'Cause I'm a sidewinding nomad

And morals in upbringing is something that I never had
Known as the ruff ridin Texan
A bad buck from the day of my inception.
And I was raised in the poor house

My mother kicked me out so she could start a whore house
Now since the day I left the corral
I've been on a quest for the plant that's called mescal
'Cause pale rider once pulled me aside
And told me that high was the best way to ride...

[Chorus 3]
Now I'm a desperate rado
Always lookin for a fight
A desperate rado
Puffin on a peace pipe
I'm a desperate rado
On the run from the law
A desperate rado baddest one you ever saw