Candied Wigs

Sweet touch
On the anchor of the themed bowling alley
I belong, I belong to a rusty team
And my son, he backs the line
For the county
And we couldn’t be prouder
Me and his mother
Things are fast approaching
Something unseen
But if we have family
Who can come between?
Without alerting our sheriff of the family?

When his ashen face came to the door
I thought my boy had crashed
In his sports car

Some little cheerleader
Had said some crazy stuff
He’s never been rough
She must be making it up
Not my boy!

And if thе candied wigs are selling
Wе put a bell above the door
She used to come in here
When she was little
Now she’s graduated to the record store

Yeah I totally believe
What happened with Stephanie!
Tom can be such a fucking cunt sometimes
I don’t understand why she’s with him
Just because he backs the line
His parents think he’s knight
In shining armour
They forked out all that cash after his crash
Playing chicken out on the Old Road
With some guy in satin pants and moustache
Stephanie, I believe ya!
What are they going to do?
I saw his Daddy
In the neon of the supermarket light
Whacked out of it but I…
Know I heard him coo: “Not my boy!”

And when his son fell off the horse
He dropped his clubs and fled the course
I’ve never voted Democrat
But who’d invent a thing like that?

And when the candied wigs are selling
Like to put a bell above the door
She used to come in here after school
Now she’s graduated to the record store