A Flash Bang in a Tight Space

Is anyone else here , it seems a very lonely place
It's cold , my knuckles are numb , my fingertips tingle
The sun glistens of the rooftop infront of me
I left in the darkness arrived in the light
The silent city before me

blood boils so silently
A comrade in arms bringing me down
I shed a singular tear
That hand doesn't reach down no more
I'm the one always picking myself up from the floor
Lost breath , part of my soul feels death
my world tightens up
I have to mentaly strap my hands
A millimetre from crossing the line
A millimetre from seeing red
A millimetre from something I shouldn't have said
A millimetre from Feeling nothing

Life isn't about having loads of friends
Life is about feeling those friends

Every day building up those walls
The walls We brake down We now enforce and renforce
To stop the next grenade the next explosion like a flash bang in a tight space
Well be blinded again by love
by the feeling of want
only to be shown how much We are not wanted
Slowly Suffocating everything that felt good
We get lost by wanting to feel life to feel the adrenaline

If you don't steal then life is stolen from us
Why can I never truly get that feeling
Why do I imagine the made up shit I see
Wanted to truly know what loss feels like
I feel I'm a coward to my own emotions
I want to ball my eyes out and cry

yet for what reason

Give me a reason

The world crashing around me
maybe I will never feel
But I want to feel free so bad
I want to pore my heart out and actually have someone listen
About what about what, tell me what to cry about
Not something fake , not something funny not a materialistic
A place where I can be listened to and really break the fourth wall of this cell , and show myself that this is loss , this is the emptiness of it all
And then carry on saying everything's alright and feeling it crumble
I'm not ready to go yet please don't make me finish
Let me shed one more tear
Let me say one more fuck you
For breaking what I had so little of
And let me cry for absolutely no reason I

one more thank you for breaking what I had so little of let me cry for no reason because its all I want to do