I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For (1991 A Cappella Mix)

[Intro]
(Reproduction or what?
-What did you say?
-What kind of production?
-There are all sorts of possibilities... You could do, you know, a little spoof on something-)
(This is also nothing new)
(-Yeah, get some stuff together, no problem, y'know. Depends on what you do)
(C'mon, let's look...)
(Journey?)
[Laughter] Oh, well... (no, no, no)
(This is American Top 40)

[Verse 1: The Weatherman]
I have climbed the highest mountains (Uh, I believe that's the Weatherman there)
And guess what? (Where ya at?) I have run through the fields
Only to be with you
Yup, with you. No one else, just you... (Here's the first top 40 hit-)
And guess what? (-for the Irish band from Dublin who call themselves U2:
I have climbed) I have run, (The highest mountain) I have crawled
(I have run) I have scaled these city walls, (Through the fields...)
Yeah, that's really great, I can't believe I did it, but nevertheless
I have done that for you. (That's the letter U and the numeral 2.)
Only to be with you, I've done all these things (The f-)
Yeah, with you, the fat one, that's it. (The f-)
You're the fat one, and I wanna be with you
(What's the matter?) (Can I say-er, why was it changed here?)
But, on the other hand, I still haven't found what I'm looking for
(That's the letter U and the numeral 2) (Maybe they'll make it as a junior U2)

[Chorus: Weatherman]
But, on the other hand, I still haven't found what I'm looking for
(That's the letter U and the numeral-) (They say-)
Nope, definitely not. (-2.) I haven't found it
(They say they're kinda like U2)
I just can't seem to find it
(That's the letter U and the numeral 2)
Nope, definitely not I haven't found it
(That's the letter U and the numeral 2) (C'mon)

[Verse 2: Weatherman]
And here's what else I've done:
(C'mon, let's see what we can find)
I have kissed honey lips
Felt the healing in her fingertips--I've even done that!
(That's the letter U and the numeral 2)
While I was doing that—y'know, all the kissing on the honey lips?
It burned like fire, and it reminded me of cheap, melting plastic—the kind that makes little clouds of white vapo-gas, and then when it catches on fire, it makes those little... little strings of black smoke with little ashes attached to them
That's how it was, kissing honey lips (Why are we doing it? Why have we changed something?)

[Chorus]
And I still haven't found it. (Uh...) What I'm looking for, that is
I just don't know where the hell it is! I just can't seem to find it...

[Interlude]
[Bono]
Uh, the last thing we wanted to do was sound like anybody else. So with U2- (That's the letter U and the numeral 2) -you've gotta challenge it, you know, musically speaking. You know, you've gotta find new sounds on the guitar, you've gotta find a new way of approaching a 4/4 beat, You know, rock & roll still needs innovation... you know... and there's a lot... there's a... there's a lot out there...

(Someone has said, "Get a great idea, a great purpose, marry it, and raise a family.")
(What the hell's going on here?) (Bono)
(Why, Billy, look!)

[Casey Kasem]
See, I should be saying, "American Top 40 is heard in the 50 states and around the-" (Are you too married to a great idea?) -It was... It was every week: "American Top 40 is heard in the-"
(Everything is topsy-turvy!
-I'll say it is!)
-Is it to just screw up things? (Marriage is not you two living for each other) 'Cause I can't say this...y'know...
(Let's see what we can find
-Everything is such a mess!)
Jeez, I thought we were almost finished...
(It is you two uniting to live as a team for this great purpose)
(What's the matter? Find something?
-No)

[Weatherman & CB Operator]
[?]...fuck his ass... go jerk his bone! (No, I can't find anything here...)
That damn sewer-mouth is back again
[?]
(There's no one in here now...There's nothing but Uncle Jim's short wave radio set)

[Kasem, Don Joyce & (Operator)]
Ponderous! Is Don on the phone?
Hi, Casey. Uh, had 'em put me right on the speakerphone for ya... Uh, now... I just got word from Mr. Friday that, uh... uh, we can't pay you anything for this until, uh, our label sends us some of the money they owe us... so this will, uh, have to be benefit terms...
Good golly Miss Molly!
Well, I gotta catch a plane. Give my regards to the Weatherman and, uh, heh, You Too!
Y'know, they do this to me all the time... I dunno what the hell they do it for, but...
(Yeah, that... the guy that was talkin' to the sewer-mouth there, bring em back)
...Now, make it- and I also want to know what happened to the pictures I was supposed to see this week?

[Weatherman & Operator]
Hey, sewer-mouth
Could be. Hey, I'm on a frequency, bet ya can't find me
He's got the sideband out, there?
(That's the letter 2 and the numeral U)

[Weatherman]
Heh heh heh heh! I was a worm in the night
And, cold as a stone I was
(Alright, alright, OK, Let's try it, OK?)
(Cyndi? OK)

[Verse 3: Weatherman]
And I believe in kingdom come (OK)
And all the colors bleeding into one big mess (OK)
I'll probably have to get out the S.T.P. cleaner on that one, maybe the 409, but I'm not sure yet (Uh)
(That's the letter U and the numeral 2) (I have the envelope here)
And you broke the bonds, (And uh...) You broke the goddamn bonds, (And uh...) You loosened the chains (I have the envelope)
You've carried a cross (I have the envelope here) and my shame
And my shame... Shame, shame, shame, shame, shame... (and, uh) So much shame, yeah. [laughter] (And uh... l'm a little nearsighted)
(Why have we changed something that we've been doing all along?)
Y'know, I believe it (Alright-) No, I guess I don't believe it...
I don't know what I'm talking about... (This is, this is blowin'... y'know-)

[Chorus: Weatherman]
But, nevertheless, I still haven't found it! (That's the letter U)
I haven't found what I'm looking for, I haven't found it. (I can't say it again!)
W: I'm looking for it, but I don't even know where it is (-and the numeral 2)
I don't even really know (Before we announce the winner-) anything anymore, I just... (See, that doesn't sound right, either)
...I don't really know what to do... (Let's just-) (Alright-) (Let's just-) Or do I?
(-recap-) (OK, let's try it, OK?) (-the nominees.)
But I still haven't found it (That's the letter U and the numeral 2) That doesn't make sense
But I still haven't found it. I'm looking, (I have the envelope here)
I'm..., no, I'm I'm looking for (I have the envelope here)
No, just I'm looking for it. (I have the envelope) (That's the letter U and the numeral 2)
(There ain't nobody can find me on this frequency)
And I-[laughter] (U2!)
I just don't know much of anything. Maybe I oughta be shot point blank in the stamper tonight!
(That's the letter U And the numeral 2)
(Hey, c'mon, find me! You can't find me?...)
(Is that the way I say that? I dunno how to say it)
(U2, I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For)
Well, I'll be jiggered, there it is

[Outro: Kasem]
"We're counting down the 40 biggest hits in the 50 states."
(Hey sewer-mouth, we're gonna getcha) "This is American Top 40."
"This is American Top 40, heard-" God, I hate that. We come outta that, and then I gotta say the goddamn Ameri- (And uh) I hear the American Top 40 jingle and then I say, "This is American Top For-"
(And uh, the winner is:) Let the goddamn jingle I.D. this show. I I.D. the show whenever there isn't a jingle, don't I?! (The winner is:) Don't I do It between every goddamn record that we play?!
(INXS!)