If I Am Still Me

I took a wrong turn out of the bar that night into an empty part of town
I wandered lost through the concrete wastes as the rain came pouring down
I’m entertained by my own stupidity, black upon black
I like to stumble round in darkness just to find my way back
I have to see if I am still me, I just have to see if I am still me

That the wreckage of my body will obey my will is still worth a bet
I know I’m playing a game I’m bound to lose but I’m not beaten yet
I push every stringy sinew much harder than I should
I try to balance everything but my balance is no good
I have to see if I am still me, I just have to see if I am still me

So I’m here again, with the smile of a Cain
Just to rattle at my chains, I can take all the blame,
Give me, give me all the blame

The conventions that we’re meant to live by make no sense to me
If they could see inside our thoughts, they would lock us up and throw away the key
I’m done with asking for forgiveness I never have deserved
It’s time to call the time upon the time that I have served
I have to see if I am still me, I just have to see if I am still me