Pain

You think I'm okay
You think I am gold
You don't see my pain
So you never know
What's going in my brain
What's deep in my soul
Just think about it
Just think about it

I wasn't born with a silver spoon, I was born with a heart of gold
I was born with a heart that shows reality so I'm doing this for y'all niggas who are still alive, Rest In Peace the departed souls
This is my story
This is my life and you can't decide for me
When I was nine you could see it in my eyes homie
I wanted to make it big, tell me would you ride for me ? Or would you die for me?
I doubt it but you probably would abandon me
And that's the point where joy turns to agony
And that's the point where you fall with the gravity
And that's the point when I turn to my family
And my mother told me you can be anything you want to be, nothing is impossible
But you gotta have God by your side if you really wanna scale and jump over every obstacle
I didn't understand I was just eleven
I didn't know much about hell or heaven
I didn't know you gotta wear the right shoes and make the right moves if you're dancing with the devil
Three years later I was tryna modify my whole life and everything got nullified
And my mother got sick and I was fourteen and I was traumatized when I heard that my mother died

You think I'm okay
You think I am gold
You don't see my pain
So you never know
What's going in my brain
What's deep in my soul
Just think about it
Just think about it

Yeah she passed away, that's right yeah she passed away
Now I'm just wishing I could clear out my past away
I can't take all these shit, they say pray for her soul but I don't really give a fuck what the pastor say
They say the lord gives and the lord takes
But why he gotta take the life of the innocent?
Now I gotta live with a huge part of my life missing oh fuck it man I'm stuck in this predicament
I don't really mean to doubt my faith
I found a way my sound gon' play
Just incase I drown today, y'all should know that I was swimming to find a reason why my mother should be underground today
I moved to another city nobody was coming with me
Imagine all the things that I left behind
My siblings and friends and when I tried to catch up with them, it seemed like I was always one step behind
Those were desperate times, those were sad times
Tight lipped, long face with them sad eyes
New city, new school, new friends, new house and I had a new relationship that capsized
Goddamit, it has never felt the same
And all the anger in my heart couldn't melt the pain
Goddamit, it has never felt the same
I blamed a lotta things now there's nothing left to blame
Just Goddamit

You think I'm okay
You think I am gold
You don't see my pain
So you never know
What's going in my brain
What's deep in my soul
Just think about it
Just think about it
You think I'm okay
You think I am gold
You don't see my pain
So you never know
What's going in my brain
What's deep in my soul
Just think about it
Just think about it

Ooooh oooh oh oh oh oh oh oh
Just think about it
Just think about it
Just think about it
Just think about it
Just think about it
Just think about it
Just think about it