The Preacher & the Bear

[Verse 1]
Now a preacher went out walkin'
Twas on one Sunday morn
It was against his religion
But he took his gun along
He shot himself some mighty fine quail
And one little measly hare
But on his way returnin' home
He met a great big grizzly bear

[Verse 2]
Now the bear got down in the middle of the road
On all fours like a great big toad
And looked that preacher right square in the eye
And the preacher looked at him and said bye-bye
Started down the road, and took out to run
The bear right after that preacher did come
They run and they run for 'bout a mile
Then they both sat down and rested awhile
The preacher got up, started again
The bear, he started out with more vim
And they ran, and they ran till he spotted a tree
Said up on the limb there's a place for me
The bear got close, made a grab for him
Preacher leaped up and he made the limb
Pulled himself up and turned about
Cast his eyes to the skies and he did shout

[Chorus]
Oh, Lord, you delivered Daniel from the lion's den
Also delivered Jonah from the belly of the whale and then
The Hebrew children from the fiery furnace
So the Good Book do declare
Yes Lord, if you can't help me
For goodness' sake, don't help that bear

[Verse 3]
Now just about then the limb let go
And the preacher came tumbling down
Reached in his pocket pulled his razor out
Just before he hit the ground
He hit the ground with an awful bang
It was a terrible sight
The preacher and the bear with the razor in his hair
Just a cuttin' left and right

[Verse 4]
Now they rolled around on the ground
The preacher was up, then he was down
The bear let out an awful moan
It looked like the preacher was holdin' his own
He thought if I get out of here alive
By that Good Book I will abide
I'll never sin on Sabbath day
And Sunday come I'll pray and pray
To the Heavens, he did glance
Said Lord, just give me one more chance
Then his suspenders gave away
And he knocked that bear ten feet away
Preacher got up and made a bound
For the tree where he'd be safe and sound
Pulled himself up and turned about
Cast his eyes to the skies and he did shout

[Chorus]
Oh Lord, you delivered Daniel from the lion's den
Also delivered Jonah from the belly of the whale and then
The Hebrew children from the fiery furnace
So the Good Book do declare
Yes Lord, if you can't help me
For goodness' sake, don't help that bear