It Just Occurred to Me (Explosive Diarrhea)

[Verse 1]
Out on the third date with a lady I really want
We had Italian, we had Chinese, now we’re at a Mexican restaurant
She’d giving me eyes from across the table and her foot’s in between my thighs
Tonight I’m getting lucky but I’m feeling uncomfy with a stomach rumblin’ surprise

[Chorus]
It just occurred to me
This is my biggest fear
Thought it was spiders or ghosts but no
Turns out I had no idea
Oh no, oh no, I’m gonna blow
Explosive diarrhea

[Verse 2]
Of course this is the night she’s hot and heavy for me
I’m a lot of things right now but not one of them is horny
Back at her place I try to escape but she’s not having it
She’s feeling me up and down in the kitchen, rubbing up against the cabinets

[keyboard solo]

[Verse 3]
Couldn’t hold it any longer
I spoke up when she moved her hands to my hips
Started sputtering out a sentence
Sounded more like I was guessing spots in Battleship
Told her “I think I ate something bad, I feel seasick so before
We do anything else lemme hit the head”
Then I ran there and shut the bathroom door

[Chorus]
It just occurred to me
This is my biggest fear
Thought it was spiders or ghosts but no
Turns out I had no idea
It just occurred to me
I probably won’t see her
Again after I pay her for plumbing repairs, it’s clear
Explosive, explosive diarrhea
Explosive diarrhea