Dark Night of the Soul

From rock bottom where I came to be me
Nowhere to go but get back on my feet
One step at a time
I climb, I climb, I climb
Once again I've been chillin
Dealing with my fucking feeling
Me and I all alone
Don't even know where to start unraveling
Tangled in a knot that I made all on my own
Gotta bang til my heart goes numb
Who have I become
What the fuck is I
Living in a state of daydream
Shit is catching up
Still refusing to open my eyes
Time flies under the radar I'm getting old
Wasting time I can feel my soul
Dwindling, shriveling, shivering
Nothing chivalrous
I'm in insidious mode
Gotta get a pep talk, TED talk, wise words
But they flying over my head
Gonna think I know it all til I'm dead
Fuck that's the biggest lie that I said
As I lie in my bed
Pick my brain apart
My aching heart
Don't even know where to start
Ask for help but it's useless
I don't do this
I'm the one that they come to, in part
Cause I been through shit
Independent, relentless, and wise
Give my words of advice
And I care so I do it
But who is the one that will save me
Who is my spiritual guide?
From rock bottom where I came to be me
Nowhere to go but get back on my feet
One step at a time
I climb, I climb, I climb
And I'm lost in my thoughts like a thick fog
Turn the lights on in a moment I'm blinded
Hit a fork in the road
I don't know where to go
Rear view constantly reminding
Winding down, climbing out, fighting doubt
Figuring what I'm about
Denying routes that show me how
To slow it down and do what I'm expected
No way out I'm hiding
Behind blue eyes and a smile
And I've been feeling good for a while
But when I feel down
Nobody's around and I drown in my feels
But my field it requires
For me to be beacon
They seeking my guidance
Negative thoughts gotta hide 'em
My demons alone I'll be fighting
And the sequence of life is exciting
An array of madness the hat tricks
Turning straight gold into plastic
Shit is backwards
And I'm back on my bullshit
Acting like a teen and a nuisance
What the fuck is you saying
Bolt outta here
Acting outta fear
Rationale is lacking
Never pass tears
Wanna press rewind go to last year
I'll be fine for now
Til the skies clear