The Audacity!
How in the fuck did I get home?
I just woke up, I'm still stoned
I'm thinking 'bout calling it quit's
‘cause I'm sick of the shit
That I've got to deal with on a daily basis
‘Cause I've been going hard with no night off
‘Cause I don't want no fucking part-time job
They want me to be some man I'm not
I do what I want
I rock a Red Sox hat in the Bronx
I don't floss, I just rap about flaws
I get bucks like fawns while
They all just flaunt
They wonder why I write rap songs
It's a white guy without dying my hair blonde
And if he's a rap star, where is the car
That he described every line
Of the sixteen bars?
Where's the 16 hard hype men behind him?
(They're hidin')
And why aren't these hoes grinding?
Are his rhymes imbibed with gang violence?
Is he somebody whose buddies are all dying?
Does he want to get rich or die Ryan?
He's buggin' if he's not thuggin'
He should try silence
He'll get served like a diner
Skinny man, should've joined an indie band
Rocked eye liner
I've seen him leave the bar, Nissan car
With a tattooed arm that
Was little like shriners
And if he rhymes off the brain, in Maine
Does he keep a nine behind
The coat like primer?
If the DJ put the vinyl on
Would he rhyme along tighter
Than a dyke's vagina?
Is he Spose? Higher than Spock
Blunts in the blizzard while I'm
Whippin' by the cops
Lyrical loogies that I hawk non-stop
Then I pull off the lot, bumpin' Aesop Rock
I'm definitively intricate, an entertainer
Bring it till they're
Hatin' or hyperventilatin'
I'm penetratin' your brain
Yeah, fuck what you thought
Spose juxtapose written prose and pot
I jizzem on the rhythm, toss in the towel
Somehow got a hit, still went foul
I'm 24 bars in so what now?
I'll do 24 more 'fore I put the mic down
Follow no trend, obediently
As in, you might see me in a medium tee
I just got lines like a DMV
And I fix 'em up in Maine like I'm CMP
They wonder, "How dare he rap about ganja
When kids still die in genocides in Rwanda?"
Yeah, I should shut my mouth
But I keep rocking like a
Chair in a haunted house
I'm from the dirt roads, dusty antiques
On the microphone, so damn sweet
You brought weed then my interests pique
Kick a hole in the speaker
I'll say sorry and then peace
Teeth unbleached
With the physique of a geek
My beak reach next week
But I'm neat with the speech
When I skeet on beat
Unique and out there like Mozambiques
Run circles around rappers like inner tubes
Still mad humble in an interview
Whether rich or monetarily minuscule
I'm who you relate to, buddy
‘cause I've been a dude
And if you heard me, can't deny, I
Got the shit to tell the MCs, "Bye bye"
Take all of their women and their free WiFi
Sorry, you best believe I'm high
And I do what I want
Might drink the bong water if
It's murky like a swamp
And if rapping in Maine is so wrong
Just know the kid who mad
This beat is from Vermont, yeah
And that's how it has to be
I got room keys like I'm Cassidy
I'm at the Red Roof Inn, don't ask for me
Because it's trashy, don't bring Ashley
Spizzy Spose, Peter Sparker, I'm dastardly
I might hog until the pigs come
Pass the weed i could've fucked up massively
But instead I made it, the audacity
Let's break it down
How in the fuck did I get home?
I just woke up, I'm still stoned
I'm thinking 'bout calling it quit's
‘cause I'm sick of the shit
That I've got to deal with on a daily basis
‘Cause I've been going hard with no night off
‘Cause I don't want no fucking part-time job
They want me to be some man I'm not