Humbugs in Your Bed
[Chorus: Whipstick]
You better watch out, you better not cry
You better not pout, I'm telling you why
Santa Claus is comin' to town (Bitch!)
Santa Claus is comin' to town
Santa Claus is comin' to town (Suck my dick!)
[Verse 1: Mr 8 Legz]
Hey, naughty or nice, I'm jolly tonight
Rolling on yayo and molly alike
Call me Macaulay, I'm caulkin' your wife
Cum in her mouth and her body of Christ (God damn it)
Like alright, Paul Wight (Get it?) It was a big show
Then I dressed up as Krampus, walked around campus
Handful of pamphlets, used them to slit throats
Listening to BFF2 on the holidays
Ruin the mood in a moment I'm on the way
Showing up nude and then puking up all of this
Blame it on you until all of it culminates
In me suggesting y'all eat a cock, it's a proper replacement
Press that Glock to your faces, let down
Lockеd you in the basement, givе y'all death by starvation
[Verse 2: Stray]
Better watch out, better not cry
Better not sigh, better not make a peep or I
Might lead this raggedy male butcher gang
Gettin' squirm at the bottom I'ma tell your bitch your wrist tied (Bitch)
I don't really give a fuck about what's right (Nah)
Got a lot of bad shit on my mind
Been been on the shit list, not nice
Got a gang of friends with me hanging outside
And we mob like shoving up sweet treats with the cyanide
Everybody lifeline getting shorter by the minute
And a really good riddance, no pulse left in they neck, life's finite
Yeah, silent night death wish
Been counting my blessings
Stray and Fun Time, no Santa, we slay shit
Long Live Evil plaguing your playlist
[Chorus: Whipstick]
You better watch out, you better not cry
You better not pout, I'm telling you why
Santa Claus is comin' to town (Bitch!)
Santa Claus is comin' to town
Santa Claus is comin' to town (Suck my dick!)
[Verse 3: Whipstick]
I'm wood grain grippin' and twenty inch blades drippin'
'Cause I stuck the knife in your Adam's apple, it's merry Christmas
Whipstick checked the list twice, your bitch ass never been nice
On any track I'm stuffing a lump of coal in your windpipe
The night before the festivus, you'll fester with the rest of us
And set the precedent I sever limbs over pathetic gifts
You better watch out, you better not cry
Because you earned this gift wrapped beating, I'm leaving you pulverized
[Verse 4: Doc Gruesome]
Yo, this year I got a motherfuckin' sack of butcher knives
And I'ma swing them bitches 'til it stick inside this pussy spine
I sit inside the darkness all year long
Sharpening the tips of candy canes until my fingers raw
Fuck coal, I'm giving bad kids crack rocks
Maybe they can make it out the hood if all the tax stops
And fuck y'all, I'm never folding on the gang and them
Hang you from my house in decoration watch me strangle 'em
[Chorus: Whipstick]
You better watch out, you better not cry
You better not pout, I'm telling you why
Santa Claus is comin' to town (Bitch!)
Santa Claus is comin' to town
Santa Claus is comin' to town (Suck my dick!)
[Verse 5: Donnie Menace]
Pulling up with all my reindeer and ready
To kick in your door, fuck using a chimney
Hennessy got me wanting to fuck
And I heard that your mother is who can assist me
Hold all my gifts, take whoever I want
I stole this shit, these gifts aren't bought
The elves are quitting their jobs
But either way, fuck it, they're presents, you get what you got
Timmy is getting a brick of some blow
And little Teresa is getting a Glock
If Santa got you any type of Apple device, the tracker is getting you caught
Sorry and shit for the random gifts, and if you had a wish
I don't even have my list, I took a massive shit and wiped my ass with it
[Outro]
You better watch out, you better not cry
You better not pout, I'm telling you why
Santa Claus is comin' to town
Santa Claus is comin' to town
Santa Claus is comin' to town
[Skit]
*Loud chewing*
Dude, shh
Whip, stop
Yo, for real
Stop
Dude, stop
No
What the fuck do you mean no?
You gotta stop
You can't be-
You're munching like an asshole, dude
Stop it
Dude, what the-
Are y- that's not being quiet
What the fuck?
*Heavy breathing*
You got sleep apnea while you're fuckin' awake dude?
What the fuck are you doing?
Quit
It's not hard to breathe, dude
I didn't say it was, but it sure as fuck sounds like it, so word
Shut up
No, fuck you, don't tell me to shut up, you fuck-
I'm just standing here
Yeah, and you're doing it poorly
This is supposed to be quiet
Just, look, shut the fuck up, shh, shh
Thank you
Oh my fucking God
Why the fuck do you have more chips?
Legit, you could be anywhere else in this fuckin' house
And you're still just sitting next to me with a fuckin' bag of chips
Are you fuckin' stupid? Stop it
*Choking*
It's about time
Good
I hope you choke
I hope, I hope this is the end
I don't know CPR, dog, you go out that way
*Drinking milk*
How are you drinking shit and now you're louder?
Blue caps only
That doesn't fuckin' answer my question
*Opening bottle*
Are you fuck- what are you f-
Oh, room temperature Code Red
Okay, it's not blue caps when we're talking Mountain Dew, dude
It's Code Red
Asshole
Yeah, what the fuck else do you think I'm gonna wash all that delicious two percent with?
I don't know, maybe not liquid
*Burp*
You're fucking gross
You know, I'ma leave
This is- this is the problem, is I didn't leave at the beginning
My bad
*Burp*
Fuck
*Humming*
I'm texting Whip right now, uh
'Cause they wanted me to hum "Silent Night" for this skit that's three and a half fucking minutes long
That's longer than all the songs on the album combined, almost
This skit is too long
It's way too long
Oh, shit, you guys forgot to do the thing
*Pop*