Six Degrees of Inner Turbulence

She can't stop pacing
She never felt so alive
Her thoughts are racing
Set on overdrive
It takes a village
This she knows is true
they're expecting her
And she's got work to do
He helplessly stands by
It's meaningless to try
As he rubs his red-rimmed eyes
He says I've never seen her get this bad
Even though she seems so high
He knows that she can't fly
and when she falls out of the sky
He'll be standing by

She was raised in a small Midwestern town
By a charming and eccentric loving father
She was praised as the perfect teenage girl
And everyone thought highly of her
And she tried everyday
With endless drive
To make the grade
Then one day
She woke up to find
The perfect girl
Had lost her mind

Once barely taking a break
Now she sleeps the days away
She helplessly stands by
It's meaningless to try
All she wants to do is cry
No one ever knew she was so sad
Cause even though she gets so high
And thinks that she can fly
She will fall out of the sky
But in the face of misery
She found hopefulness
Feeling better
She had weathered
This depression
Much to her advantage
She resumed her frantic pace
Boundless power
Midnight hour
She enjoyed the race

Napalm showers
Showed the cowards
We weren't there to mess around
Through heat exhaustion
And mind distortion
A military victory mounted on innocent ground
Hearing voices from miles away
Saying things never said
Seeing shadows in the light of the day
Waging a war inside my head
Years and years of
Bloodshed and warfare
Our mission was only to get in and kill
A free vacation

Of palmtrees and shrapnel
Trading innocence for permanent psychotic hell
Hearing voices from miles away
Saying things never said
Seeing shadows in the light of the day
Waging a war inside my head
Feeling strangers staring my way
Reading minds never read
Tasting danger with each word I say
Waging a war inside my head

Standing in the darkness
Waiting for the light
The smell of pure adrenaline
Burning in the night
Random blinding flashes
Aiming at the stage
Intro tape begins to roll
Igniting sonic rage
Still they keep me between these hollow walls
Hoping to find in me
The answers to the test that stumped them all

"The boy is simply crazy
Suffering from delusions
We honestly think that maybe
He might need an institution
He lives in a world of fiction
And really could use some help
We have just the place to fix him
To save him from himself"
Curled up in the darkness
Searching for the light
The smell of stale sweat and shit
Streaming through the night
Random urine testing
Pills red, pink and blue
Counseling and therapy
Providing not a clue
Still they keep me between these hollow walls
Hoping to find in me
The answers to the test that stumped them all

"We can't seem to find the answers
He seemed such a clear cut case
We cannot just let him leave here
And put all this work to waste
Why don't we try shock treatment
It really might do some help
We have just the tools to fix him
To save him from himself"

Goodnight kiss in your nightgown
Lavender in your bed
So innocent as you lie down
Sweet dreams that run through your head
Are you lonely without Mommy's love?
I want you to know I'd die for that moment
You're just a poor girl
Afraid of this cruel world
Taken away from it all
It's been 5 years to the day and
My tainted blood's still the same
I can't help acting this way and
Those bastard doctors are gonna pay
I'm so lonely without baby's love
I want you to know I'd die for one more moment
I'm just a poor girl
Afraid of this cruel world
Taken away from it all

He seemed no different from the rest
Just a healthy normal boy
His mama always did her best
And he was daddy's pride and joy
He learned to walk and talk on time
But never cared much to be held
and steadily he would decline
Into his solitary shell
As a boy he was considered somewhat odd
Kept to himself most of the time
He would daydream in and out of his own world
but in every other way he was fine
He's a Monday morning lunatic
Disturbed from time to time
Lost within himself
In his solitary shell
A temporary catatonic
Madman on occasion

When will he break out
Of his solitary shell
He struggled to get through his day
He was helplessly behind
He poured himself onto the page
Writing for hours at a time
As a man he was a danger to himself
Fearful and sad most of the time
He was drifting in and out of sanity
But in every other way he was fine
He's a Monday morning lunatic
Disturbed from time to time
Lost within himself
In his solitary shell
A momentary maniac
With casual delusions
When will he be let out
Of his solitary shell
I'm alive again
The darkness far behind me
I'm invincible
Despair will never find me
I feel strong
I've got a new sense of elation
Boundless energy
Euphoria fixation

Still it's hard to just get by
It seems so meaningless to try
When all I want to do is cry
Who would ever know I felt so sad
Even though I get so high
I know that I will never fly
And when I fall out of the sky
Who'll be standing by
Will you be standing by
She keeps her hair simple and plain
She never wears makeup
But no one would care if she did anyway
She doesn't recall yesterday
Faces seem twisted and strange
But she always wakes up
Only to find she'd been miles away
Absence of awareness
Losing time
A lapse of perception
Losing time
Wanting to escape

She had created a way to survive
She learned to detach from herself
A behavior that kept her alive
Hope in the face of our human distress
Helps us to understand the turbulence deep inside
That takes hold of our lives
Shame and disgrace over mental unrest
Keeps us from saving those we love
The grace within our hearts
And the sorrow in our souls
Deception of fame
Vengeance of war
Lives torn apart
Losing oneself
Spiraling down
Feeling the walls closing in
A journey to find
The answers inside
Our illusive mind