Shady Acres

[Intro]
I think of who's to blame
And I bow my head in shame

[Verse 1]
So you've grown tired of your parents always hanging around
They spoil your children and having grandparents is out
Yes, and they raised you well, but you wished to hell
That they'd go away, so you wouldn't have to pay for their food
Forget all the years when they paid for you

[Chorus]
Send your mother to Shady Acres
Send your father to Shady Acres
We'll take good care of them
You won't be 'ware of them
Send them to Shady Acres

[Verse 2]
Well, if one of them's dead, don't worry your head, 'cause we have a matchmaker
They can sit down and kvetch on the rest home steps while watching green acres
If you don't want to visit, well, there's no requisite
We have foster sons and daughters to help all our boarders to stop feeling blue
Keep the checks coming and we won't bother you

[Chorus]
Send your mother to Shady Acres
Send your father to Shady Acres
We'll take good care of them
You won't be 'ware of them
Send them to Shady Acres

[Verse 3]
Our home's so peaceful, they'll die while they're sleeping, yes, right in their beds
Now there's no need for worry, we have our own mortuary, and a beautiful cemetery
Yes, we are good people, we care for the feeble
We've devoted our lives to the husbands and wives
Who don't want their fathers around to be bothers
So send them! We're respectable and tax deductible

[Chorus]
Send your mother to Shady Acres
Send your father to Shady Acres
We'll take good care of them
Because we love them
Send them to Shady Acres

[Outro]
Well, the Freudian doctors they tell me, "Have no fear, it's not your fault
You're growing up bad 'cause your parents did you wrong"
And I blamed it on my parents, on the teachers in the school
'Til I remember once upon a time, they had parents too
I think of who's to blame
And I bow my head in shame