Big Old Goofy World

Up in the morning.
Work like a dog.
Is better than setting
like a bump on a log.

Mind all your manners.
Be quiet as a mouse.
Some day you'll own a home,
that's as big as a house.

I know a fellow.
He eats like a horse.
Knocks his old balls,
round the old golf course.

You ought to see his wife.
She's a cute little dish.
She smokes like a chimney,
and drinks like a fish

There's a big old goofy man
dancing with a big old goofy girl,
Oh baby, it's a big old goofy world.

Elvis had a woman,
with a head like a rock.
I wish I had a woman,
that made my knees knock.

She'd sing like an angel,
and eat like a bird.
And if I wrote a song,
she'd know every single word.

There's a big old goofy man
dancing with a big old goofy girl,
Oh baby, it's a big old goofy world.

Kiss a little baby.
Give the world a smile.
And if you take an inch,
give them back a mile.

Cause if you lie like a rug,
and you don't give a damn,
you're never going to be,
as happy as a clam.

I'm sitting in a hotel,
trying to write a song.
My head is just as empty,
as the day is long.

Why it's clear as a bell,
I should have gone to school.
I'd be wise as an owl,
Instead of stubborn as a mule.

There's a big old goofy man
dancing with a big old goofy girl,
Oh baby, it's a big old goofy world.

Oh baby, it's a big old goofy world.