Why Do Bad Things Happen to Good People?

Why do bad things happen to good people?
And does anybody even care?
I left some tissue in my trousers
Now my laundry's all got dandruff
And that was everything I had to wear

Why do bad things happen to good people?
I guess that life just isn't fair
I went shopping and forgot
My bag for life so I had to buy another one
Now I've got a pair

And that just can't be right
When I've only got one life
And I've wasted so much time
Trying to get served in shoe shops
And although she seems quite nice
I'd rather not spend all night
Talking telephone tariffs with a lady
Who may be a robot

Why do bad things happen to good people?
And yes I know that worse things happen at sea
But how can I take any pleasure
From such naval misadventures
Just because they are not happening to me?
It feels mean
Schaudenfraude by sea

Why do bad things happen to good people?
Specifically me